Archive for Goal Setting

Jan
06

Powerful Relationships – Part 2

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Tonight I had a “moment” with my wife and got angry. It was one of those discussions about money and finances that we are loathe to have because it is usually so uncomfortable.  Usually its because both of us spend too much – me on business things and her on home items and gifts.

This time the problem surfaced because – of all things – good news!

We just received another offer from some people to buy our former home.  Great!  But with this news comes the moment of decision – how and where to actually put this windfall?   Predictably,  Brigitte started in on me about what I said before (but don’t remember) about where we should put the funds, while I fretted and fumed, and alternated between victim and tyrant.

I suddenly knew we had another “teaching moment” to get clear on what it was we actually wanted.  so we cleared our energy using muscle testing, then were able to talk with one another like adults.   Together we decided that we would need to bring in a third party to tell us what to do.  Obviously, we didn’t know how to get out of debt – and STAY out of debt – or we would have already done it!

DaveRamseyFPI mentioned wanting to attend classes based on the book Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey.  Brigitte wanted us to go to Debtors Anonymous meetings.  Maybe we’ll do both; we are committed to getting this 600-pound gorilla off our shoulders and becoming of one mind about money and finances.

New Years’ resolution? You might say so.  These resolutions become truly powerful when you can learn to let go of the emotional “stuff,” connect with the other person, and resolve to work together.  The Logical Soul ™ makes this much easier.

We plan on attacking this problem head-on . . . and may your 2010 be equally as potent!  Now if we can only get the Federal Government to do this . . . !!

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New Years are always special, but this one was particularly so to our family. Getting over the old year will take some doing.

Before the Big Apple dropped (or Big Peach if you’re in Atlanta), the 31st of December was memorable for its final Hurrah:  the full Moon – a Blue Moon – crowds gathered at Pigeon Forge, TN and Gatlinburg for the fireworks, and all sorts of stuff happening around the world that I had no clue about.

It was the last day on Earth for my mother, Barbara Weatherly.

My sister Page and I are still working through the end-of-life details, with help from our spouses and other family and friends.  Although I still attempt to put my thoughts in this blog, my other work has essentially ground to a halt.  Somehow it doesn’t matter right now – the emails, phone calls, publishing my book, and creating courses.  So please forgive me if I’m a bit slow on the uptake…

(L-R) Page, "Baboo," Brigitte and Michael

(L-R) Page, "Baboo," Brigitte and Michael

Barbara Weatherly’s funeral will be 11 am, Saturday, January 2nd, 2010 at Farrar Funeral Home in Dandridge, Tennessee. Obituary notices will be placed in newspapers in Dandridge and Savannah (her birthplace and home town).

After the funeral, Brigitte and I are headed back to Atlanta, and back to “normal” life.  It will not, however, be business as usual.

During the time I spent with my mother, I got real clear about my purpose on this planet:  to write and teach what I know.  And what I know is the Logical Soul(tm) and how to share that with others.

I also received the gift of a deep motivation to carry out this purpose, no matter what. Apparently I had a hidden decision to never put traction to my goals and dreams.  Consequently, no matter how hard I worked, the results were not forthcoming.

Thanks to Mom, my life is again transformed.

Flippantly (and drunkenly) making just another New year’s resolution is usually a waste of time.  Most of these resolutions are merely wishes.  Unless you are able to tap into and use deep emotional experiences like birth or death, hidden decisions will not change.

Use your so-called tragedies (or celebration in the case of a new birth).  I used the event of my Mom’s death to visualize and commit to a life I wanted for myself and others but have not been able to thus far materialize.

A commitment to a dying loved one is powerful.  The combined force of deep yearning and sadness coupled with a new commitment (i.e., decision) gives anyone an ability to bore a hole through all obstacles.

So thanks again Mom; I won’t let you down.  Stay tuned for some exciting energy coming from yours truly!

Seed of Failure?

Seed of Failure?

How do you deal with criticism or failure in your life?

Does it make you downtrodden?  Sad?  Or do you get angry or upset?   Does this feeling Last?  Or do you just slough it off and move on?

These are important considerations – how you handle both criticism and failure.  In fact, this single factor is the basis of your success. Your ability to rebound from certain failure – not the failure itself – determines whether or not you are a winner.

That doesn’t mean you have to fail constantly to be successful, no.  But failure is inherent in success . . . just as stumbling is inherent in learning to walk.  Everybody does it; everybody fails.  And it’s said that the only barrier to success is giving up.

I looked at this for years and years, because I failed more times than I’ve succeeded; in fact many more times.  In the beginning of these failures I was totally crushed.  Defeated.  I had this feeling inside like somebody punched me in the stomach; did it to me personally. Each failure became like a personal cross I had to bear . . . and it hurt.  I mean, failure absolutely hurts in the beginning.

While I knew most of the problem was inside me, that knowledge didn’t help.  There was something there, inside myself; inside my gut that just did not allow me to move forward.

Affirmations, success training, writing down and repeating goals, and rah-rah seminars and other motivational training only served to add to my despair once the smoke had cleared and reality set in.

I discovered there is a distinct difference between those who operate under what I call the “seed of failure” (SOF) and those who operate under a different set of rules entirely . . . governed by what I call the “seed of success” (SOS).  Based on the Law of Attraction, there is a pattern of either failure or success that is born and set in motion, depending on which seed you own.

Based on the fact that my life mostly sucked, I was aware I probably operated out of the first seed  (SOF).  It took me most of my life, however,  to discover exactly what my own seed of failure was and how to root it out.

The reason was that this seed – like that which sprouts and grows into a kudzu plant in the southern United States – was extremely powerful and resistant (Riddle:  How do you grow Kudzu?  Answer: Throw the seeds on the ground, fertilize them with concrete blocks, and run like heck before it grows all over you!).  All the affirmations and goal-setting in the world was not going to dislodge this sucker!

We are born with both seeds of failure and success. One, however, is dominant.  Maybe it became dominant in the first few years of our life. Maybe it became dominant through ancestral tendencies.  I don’t know.  What I do know, however, is that most people are either born with, or develop at an early age, the tendency to fail.  The innate strong drive for success is a rare gift.

By the way, the “seed of failure” (SOF) is NOT the same failure spoke of by those I call “The Great Ones” – those I consider to be the masters of Achievement – high-income earners and producers.  Most of their failures – though many – had to do with circumstances, or outside obstacles and barriers.  They still had their emotional/mental Seed of Success (SOS) firmly planted, even if it started out small, or wasn’t apparent to others.

Different success and motivation gurus report their own unique trials and tribulations, i.e., arriving in the US “with a buck-fifty in my pocket;” “sleeping in my apartment bathtub;” “selling vacuum cleaners door-to-door” and other delightful memories.  These, however, only strengthened their resolve (or SOS) to achieve unbelievable success in later life.  One with the Seed of Success,  in fact, uses all these failure stories to actually lay the foundation for his or her later success.

In the beginning of my search for success I even took a page from their book.  I started documenting all my humble circumstances in hopes this exercise would spur me to greater success as well.  It didn’t.  After a decade of writing all this stuff down, nothing changed.  I finally decided to ditch the whole thing after the stack of sob stories got too depressing to look at!

It took some very subtle stealth tactics and quite a bit of grace (and maybe a touch of luck) to be able to access my own SOF and render it impotent.  I’m sharing this with you in hopes that you won’t have to repeat what I went through, along with countless others.

If you’re young, that’s great.  You can take this information now and use it to expand your SOS exponentially.  If you’re older, you will have a deeper appreciation of the fact that anything that allows the subconscious to go from failure to success is, indeed, a remarkable process!!

Next: Failure Has a Very Good Reason

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Dec
17

Mind Detox with Logical Soul

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Dec
16

How to Fail by Using Affirmations

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HelpDo you really think that yelling some affirmation to your spouse over and over again will make a difference in his or her behavior?

No?  Then why do we persist in doing  this same thing to our subconscious mind – the source of all feelings, memory, and unlimited intelligence and wisdom?  Our conscious mind can only direct (and is really pretty stupid).

Contrary to popular psychology and positive-motivation-teaching, the subconscious is not a “thing” that can be manipulated or turned on or off like some light switch.  It is the source of all our knowledge and power, and is wise to all our tricks.  If there were a decision made to limit money or income, it is because this is a “prime directive” that was given very early in your life that governs your actions and where you are right now!

If you really want to fail at finances, try this:  repeat “I am rich and wealthy beyond my wildest dreams.”  Do this over and over for a month.  After that period is over, one of two things will happen:

  1. You’ll discover untapped sources of creativity and wealth within yourself, or
  2. You will feel more frustrated than ever.

Obviously, the first scenario is the one whose picture is presented by all the self-made millionaire gurus out there.  They tell you that by repeating positive thoughts over and over again you get into the habit of success and money. The Law of Attraction and all that…

There’s only one problem: most self-made millionaires came into this world with – or developed at an early age – an inner resolve that can overcome any obstacle. This IS their prime directive. Without it, nobody can succeed.  WITH it, anyone can perform money miracles.  That’s why affirmations work for them, and why they think it can work for everyone.  But it doesn’t.

True, most self-made millionaires had multiple challenges and often poor upbringings.  But they also have what most of us don’t have – that “iron resolve,” “fire in the belly” or “inner direction” that eludes those of us who see failure as an option over and over again.

Given this scenario, affirmations work wonders for those with an inner resolve. For those of us less endowed, however, affirmations can only dig a deeper hole in our psyche.  Here’s how a typical inner conversation might go:

“I am rich and wealthy…”

“Are you kidding?”

“I am rich and wealthy…”

“No you’re not.  You have thirty dollars in the bank and are in debt up to your eyeballs!”

“I am rich and wealthy…”

“Do you want to fail like your brother did?  This is crazy talk.”

“I am rich and wealthy…”

“Tell you what say that one more time and I’ll NEVER let you be ‘rich and wealthy!!'”

“I am rich and …”

You get the idea.  BAM!  Failure strikes despite all your conscious good intentions.  The thing is, you’ve got to speak to your subconscious “self” the same way you would to a powerful friend or servant.  It will do your bidding . . . but only if there is no prime directive opposing it!

Go easy on the affirmations. Take baby steps.  Celebrate small successes each day.  Then your subconscious will reward you with greater and greater trust.

Jason and Michael

Jason and Michael

Jason Oman, co-author of the book Conversations with Millionaires, has just come through a major health crisis and is working on yet another book – Conversations with Female Millionaires. He will discuss both projects in an interview with Michael Craig on Logical Soul Talk tonight at 6 pm.

You can listen online with your headset or call (347) 843-4544 to listen on the phone and/or ask a question or support Jason.

Mr. Oman is a success story in just being alive and on this show.  A brain aneurysm in October of 2007 knocked down, both literally and business-wise.  Through the help of Emory Hospital, Internet associates, loving friends, and an indomitable spirit, however, he is back and more determined than ever.

Listen in tonight at 6 to hear Jason’s story:  how to succeed when you lose everything.   It is one for the ages.

This is the fourth in a series of articles on Our True Mental Potential, and how and why we are not living it.  In today’s article, I will cover how avoidance of – and distraction from – our highest goals and intentions creates mental pollution that clogs our synapses, dampens our spirits, and reduces access to our own power.

Critical Path by R. Buckminster Fuller

Critical Path by R. Buckminster Fuller

Pollution means that there are things in places where they have no business being.  Bucky Fuller, in his highly-acclaimed book Critical Path, described pollution as being merely a displacement of useful substances into areas or systems where they inhibit those systems.

Take, for example the emission of sulpher from smokestacks.  Pollution, right?  Yes, to the air we breathe.  However this same element is extremely useful in making sulpher compounds, drugs, explosives, fungicides, and other very helpful materials. If there were a way to cost-effectively capture the sulphur from these same smokestacks, the idea of pollution there would disappear.

Like that, mental pollution is the manifestation of thoughts, feelings, and ideas in a person who cannot thrive with these same thoughts, etc, but for some reason created them as a subconscious or hidden intent. Most negative thoughts fall into this category.  “I can’t,”  “It’s impossible,” and “I’m stupid” are examples of the most blatant negative thought patterns, and you can probably think of thousands more.

But these thoughts are NOT the CAUSE of the mental pollution. There is a person’s unspoken INTENT that actually spurred the thoughts to appear, like smoke from a fire.   Let’s take the case of “I can’t.”

In the case of an abused child, the act of taking on a negative thought pattern is a way to survive the abuse – at least in the mind of the child.  “I can’t” in some cases might be literally translated as “I won’t, because if I do I’ll get severely punished again.” This abuse pattern is usually repeated over and over again, from generation to generation.

The fact that this pattern may have started with your great-great-great grandfather does not make it any less real for you.  These generational “memes” – or mind viruses – have a shelf-life bordering on forever!

Positive thinking and affirmations do not address these deeper issues, and may even cause harm to the mind of the person “trying to be positive.”  If you were abused and ignore the underlying cause of the “can’t,” you will only manifest a type of mental pollution that affects your peace of mind, self-esteem, and physical and mental health.

Through an act of mental detox, you can access your true intent, come face-to-face with the true underlying decision about the abuse and/or relationship between yourself and the abuser, change that decision, and very quickly discover a lasting peace of mind.

Without mental detox, however, thoughts remain that mask or disguise your subconscious intent, and therefore keep you lost in conscious limbo.  The fact is, because your conscious mind does not have access to the hidden cause of this pollution, you will remain unaware that there is even a solution!

But there is.

David Wright

David Wright

DAVID WRIGHT is my guest on Logical Soul Talk today (December 8th) at 6 pm ET where I will ask him about some major turning points in his life and he came to write the “Get a Job” book and become an expert in the growing field of occupational counseling.

David’s Facebook page describes him as “a gaijin, a gringo, a guelo & a farang, an author, business owner, marketer, radio DJ, #1 on Yahoo! out of over a BILLION results, & an adventurer.”  He describes his passions as “life, family, friends, music and striving to become the best I can be.”

David's Book

GET A JOB: Your Guide to Making Successful Career Moves is a comprehensive job search guide loaded with real-world advice that really works, so you can too! It contains valuable tips, information, and resources useful to anyone considering making a career move, from entry level to seasoned C-level executives. The book is designed to help you stock your job search tool box with all the tools you need to get a better job, faster, and earn more money.

Get A Job is also about helping you make a good first impression, continue to succeed in your career, and learn networking skills, negotiating skills, sales skills, and how to make international career moves.

In the last two blog posts, I wrote about the uncanny power of our own mental potential, and about how our weakest link is our CONSCIOUS MIND. This post is about how to strengthen this weakest link without going through a lot of psycho-analysis, self-help courses and books.

Enjoy . . . and USE it!

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Pearl Harbor

Pearl Harbor

Happy Pearl Harbor Memorial Day. This is the day that America made a decision to go to war . . . and finished that monumental task in fine fashion (at least from our point of view!). We set a goal and accomplished it.

On a lesser note, this is also the day that marks only 17 shopping Days ‘til Christmas!

Are you out looking for that special gift for that special someone?  Or are you, like me, waiting until the very last minute and ordering online, hoping to get that thing in before the US Mail decides to shut down on the 24th?  Assuming the Postman decides NOT to cater to our whim, we have a “contingency plan” of begging and blaming, i.e., give her a card with sincere apologies along the words “Well it SHOULD have been here by now…”

I notice we all do it – sabotage our success. But why?  The road to success is not easy, but really quite simple.  As the lesson of Pearl Harbor taught us, just finish what you start.

“It’s not what you do in life that counts; it’s what you finish.” – Kathryn Hepburn

Oh, there are plenty of excuses (and lots of blame to throw around) but why would we bother to agree to something and proceed NOT to finish or do it properly?  Is it laziness?  Inherent stupidity?  Are we at the whim of a vengeful God?  Or are we just overwhelmed with possibilities, don’t know how to say “no,” and forget what we agreed to??

I vote the last one. Remember the story of the dog with the bone in his mouth?  He was standing on a bridge staring into his own reflection in the water.  He wanted SO BADLY to get that OTHER dog’s bone that he dropped the one he had in his mouth to jumps into the water to get the other one.

Like that, we make a snap – mostly reflexive – decision about some item that we feel should be on our agenda, then jump before we realize it is all part of our own illusion.  This promised “bone” is very seductive, if only because it is new and fresh.  It could be a

  • “once-in-a-lifetime money-making opportunity,”
  • “must have” new pair of bejeweled jeans, or a
  • lover who “gets us” so much better than our existing mate.

Whatever the reason to jump ship, cut short our existing project or commitment, or just spread ourselves too thin, is it so important that we give up our very center?  Our peace of mind?  I think not.

Part of a complete “mental detox” program is to actually DECIDE (consciously, not subconsciously) that a particular course of action is worthwhile . . . then proceed to finish it NO MATTER WHAT.

By doing this even a few times, you will build up the mental strength (i.e., habit) to continue doing this over and over again.  Then you know what?  You WILL accomplish your goals.  You WILL gain that elusive peace of mind.

“But Dr. Craig, what if I decide half-way through that this course of action is a waste of time and counter productive?”

Hey, if you REALLY feel it is that way, then quit. Be aware, however, that every time you start something and quit, you are driving another nail into your own “success coffin” and weakening the mental strength you would need to finish other, more important project!

Do this simple exercise: If you have trouble completing goals – say finishing a whole book – make a very small one, like reading two pages by next week.  Then DO IT.  Then set another goal, i.e, read 3 pages before another week.  Then do that!

Before you know it, one of two things will happen – either you will complete what you set out to do, or you will do MORE than you set out to do, get bored, and do even more!

Raymond Aaron

Raymond Aaron

I did and it made a HUGE difference in my ability to accomplish my goals.  With the help of Raymond Aaron, I set out last May to ride my new unicycle 3 miles in one month.  Now I ride almost 3 miles per day, and I did this by setting (and completing) very small goals each time.

Try it for 3 weeks, long enough to establish this action as a new habit.  Then write me to say how it went!

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Dec
03

Our True Human Mental Potential

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LakeSunsetThere has been a long-time observation by philosophers, scientists and psychologists alike, that suggests we use only a small fraction of our brains, and therefore a fraction of our mental potential.  I hold the same theory, and will attempt to quantify these observations in a series of articles.

The reasons I feel this exercise is important are fourfold:

  1. We tend to underestimate our potential mental capacity and power,
  2. We tend to over-exaggerate the ability of the conscious mind to achieve what we desire,
  3. We tend to AVOID achieving our goals through self-sabotage and various means of internal and external distraction, and
  4. This avoidance and distraction creates mental pollution that clogs our synapses, dampens our spirits, and reduces our access to our own power.

If I can (over the next few blog posts) show reasonably and conclusively that our fate relies on the vast, untapped reservoir of mental and emotional potential, and that there may be a method to tap into this potential, I believe that the fate of humans on this planet can be powerfully altered.

I will also attempt to show the connection between our potential extinction, and the our capacity to prevent it without massive government involvement.

Next: Part 1 – How and Why We Underestimate Our Mental Potential

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